


Sex Education

by inkinmyheartandonthepage



Series: Irondad and Spiderson [31]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Embarrassment, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Prank Wars, Sex Talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-19
Updated: 2019-03-19
Packaged: 2019-11-24 05:25:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18161996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inkinmyheartandonthepage/pseuds/inkinmyheartandonthepage
Summary: Tony tried to embarrass Peter with a sex talk - Shuri decides to turn the tables. Let the prank war continue.





	Sex Education

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! 
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed and is following this series. Without you it would not be possible so thank you to you all. 
> 
> Who is excited for April? I am because End Game comes out and it will be three hours of pure agony and awesomeness!!!!! 
> 
> This prompt is from ItCouldAllBeForNothingTommorow from AO3: Aunt May realizes and confesses to Tony that she isn't 100% certain that Ben ever gave Peter the sex talk and even if he did, now that Peter's dating maybe he could use a refresher? It starts out awkward for the both of them but then Tony starts to take pleasure in how uncomfortable and awkward Peter is. He justifies pushing on as this being stuff Peter needs to know. Maybe Peter eventually ran away and Tony left embarrassing but informative gift wrapped reading material for him in his room. Only the reading material gives Peter questions and the scientist in him wants answers. When he comes to Tony to have them answered Tony is back to finding this awkward but Peter is the one pushing him on.
> 
> I apologize for any mistakes and hope you all enjoy!

“I am Groot.”

“Tree! No,” Peter yelped but Tree had already extended his arms and reached into Peter’s backpack and pulled out a book.

“I am Groot.” Tree looked confused but Peter’s face was aflame.

Shuri snatched the book out of Tree’s hand and her face lit up as she read the title.

Peter put his hands to his face and cursed Tony for his poor timing.

“Peter,” Shuri’s smile was too gleeful. “Is there something or someone you need to tell us about?”

The team for Wakanda and the Guardians had come to the compound for a visit to update the Avengers and trade information. They had also wanted to see what technology they were using and if there was anything they could do to help upgrade their systems. In the wake of Thanos, they were not taking any chances for it to happen again. While they were being led on a tour, Peter had taken Tree and Shuri on his own tour. He had decided to show them his quarters first. He hadn’t planned on Tree snooping through his backpack and picking out the sex education book that Tony had given him only hours before. He had hastily stuffed it in his backpack when he heard they were coming so it wouldn’t be seen.

“Tony gave it to me,” Peter moaned through his hands. “I think it was his way of getting back at me for the prank I pulled.”

Shuri laughed loudly, falling back on to the bed as she clutched her stomach.

Even tree started to laugh and Peter just wanted to disappear.

When Shuri finally managed to control herself, she wiped a stray tear from under her eye. “Thank you, Peter. I needed a good laugh.”

“Why did he give it to me now though?” Peter pulled his hands away and sulked. “MJ and I just started dating. We aren’t, I mean, I’m not ready for sex. Yet.”

Shuri nodded and swallowed her laughter. She could tell that this had been bothering Peter. “At least Tony was willing to talk to you. That is good progress with your relationship.”

“I guess,” Peter perked up a little. “I mean it was embarrassing but my Uncle Ben never gave me ‘The Talk’ and I think it would just be weird with Aunt May.”

“I am Groot.” Tree pulled out several more pamphlets that Peter had stuffed into his backpack.

“Tony appears to have given you a lot of information,” Shuri took the pamphlets from Tree.

“Yeah, he seemed too happy about it,” Peter said.

“I am Groot.” Peter raised an eyebrow.

“Prank him?”

“I am Groot.”

“I like it,’ Shuri grinned. “Tony wanted to embarrass you while teaching you so we should turn it around on him.”

“I am Groot.”

“Now?” Peter yelped.

Shuri jumped off the bed. “It will be brilliant. Come. We can embarrass my brother while we are at it. Two birds, one stone.” She collected up the pamphlets and headed to the door, Tree right behind her.

“Wait for me!” Peter hurried after them. “Does this mean you are in on the prank war?”

“Yes!”

“I am Groot.”

“Clint is on our side too,” Peter said. “Though, I haven’t seen him since the prank. I think he’s hiding from Black Widow.”

“I will work on some plans,” Shuri said. “We will win this war.”

“FRIDAY, where are they?” Peter asked.

“Tony is currently escorting them through the air hanger,” FRIDAY responded.

“So how do we do this?” Peter asked.

“Tony wanted to embarrass you so we turn it around on him,” Shuri said.

“I am Groot.”

“Exactly. Ask the most embarrassing questions you can think of,” Shuri said.

Peter grinned. “This is going to be fun.” 

* * *

 

“Dad!” Tony turned and watched Peter cross the Air Hanger with Shuri and Tree beside him.

“Hey Kid,” Tony greeted. “Finished your tour?”

“Ages ago,” Peter said. “We had some questions though.”

“What about?” Tony asked.

Peter brought up a book and started flicking through the pages. “How many nerves exactly does a male penis have?”

Tony spluttered, eyes wide.

“What?” Peter looked from the book, eyes wide and innocent. “The male penis. How many nerves?”

“I – what? Why are you asking me this?” Tony managed to get out.

“Oh, we finished the tours and were going through the books you gave me,” Peter said. “We had some questions.”

“We?” T’Challa asked, eyes narrowed at his sister.

“Yes, brother. I have some questions for Mr. Stark also.”

Tony’s face went pale and he glared at Bruce who was smothering his laughter.

“Now isn’t the be-“ T’Challa started to say but was cut off.

“What kind of condoms should I use?” Peter asked.

“I am Groot.”

“What sources of protection are there for women?” Shuri asked.

“I am Groot.”

“How much sperm can a male produce?” Peter asked.

“How much can a vagina stretch?” Shuri asked.

“I am Groot.”

They continued to rapid fire questions at them that Tony could stare mouth open in horror trying to keep up and think of anything to say but his mind was blank. This is not what he had in mind when he gave Peter the sex talk. He thought it had been fun to make the kids face go red but he had been honest when he said Peter would come ask him anything.

He just thought it would be in private and not with friends.

“STOP!” Tony finally managed to yell in a strangled voice.

“He’s right,” Peter turned to Shuri and Tree. “We can just look on the internet. Come on.”

“No! Not the internet!” Tony yelled after them but they had already sprinted off.

Bruce, Natasha and Steve burst out laughing behind him while T’Challa and Scott gently patted him on the shoulder.

“Man, I am so glad my kid is not at that age,” Scott said unhelpfully.

* * *

Peter and Shuri burst out into laughter as soon as they were clear of the air hanger.

“Did you see his face,” Peter laughed.

“It was perfect,” Shuri beamed. She held her hand out for a high five and slapped Peter’s hand.

“I am Groot.”

Peter slapped Groot on his back lightly and grinned.

“Great job guys,” he said. “What should we do now?”

“FRIDAY?” Shuri asked. “Can you please send some sex websites to Tony’s phone?”

“Sending several site to Mr. Stark now.”

“NO! GET OFF THE INTERNET!” Tony’s voice roared.

They sprinted off, their laughter echoing throughout the compound.

* * *

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any prompts feel free to submit them and I will try and get to them! 
> 
> Happy Reading :)


End file.
